As Pure As The Driven Snow....

Hmmmmm. I think this means that Cabana Boy and I need more "play" time.

Your Ultimate Purity Score Is...
Category	Your Score	Average
Self-Lovin'	48.3% When I think about you - or anyone - I touch myself	65.1%
Shamelessness	45.2% Puts 'em on the glass	79.2%
Sex Drive	57.9% A fool for love, but not always	77.6%
Straightness	14.3% Knows the other body type like a map	44.5%
Gayness	85.7% Repressed, are we?	83.8%
Fucking Sick	84.1% Refreshingly normal	90%
You are 57.29% pure Average Score: 72.7%
Take The Ultimate Purity Test and see how you match up!

For My Cabana Boy

Cause I really miss you when you aren't here, baby. My body aches for your touch and I long to be close to you again. Come home soon.

Baby when I think about
The day that we first met
Wasn't looking for what I found
But I found you and I'm bound to
Find happiness in bein' around you
I'm glad when I'm making love to you
I'm glad for the way you make me feel
I love it 'cause you seem to blow my mind...everytime
I'm glad when you walk you hold my hand
I'm happy that you know how to be a man
I'm glad that you came into my life
I'm so glad
I dig the way that you get down
And you still know how to hold me
Perfect blend, masculine (can't get enough now)
I think I'm in love, damn finally...
I'm glad that you turned out to be
that certain someone special who makes this life worth living
I'm glad you're here, just lovin' me
So say that you won't leave
'Cause since the day you came I've been glad
I'm glad when I'm making love to you
I'm glad for the way you make me feel
I love it 'cause you seem to blow my mind...everytime
I'm glad when you walk you hold my hand
I'm happy that you know how to be a man
I'm glad that you came into my life
I'm so glad

Ya know, I try to be a good lil house mouse....

and he nitpicks at me. And that makes me feel inadequate because I'm not pleasing my man. And that's all I want to do is please him and make him feel happy and loved. Is that too much to ask? I mean damn.

So here's the scenario.... He calls me last night and says he's driving up. Awesome! I'm happy!!! He wants to know what I'm making him for dinner. I ask him what he would like. He says steak. (Last week he came home with a case of all different kinds of steaks, so my freezer is packed with meat. LOL) I say ok, call me when you are leaving so I know when to have it ready. Now here's the thing, I have never made steak before. I'm either too broke or the guy I'm dating is too broke to buy steak. Plus, I don't have a grill. And when my parents made steak at home we always grilled it. So I begin calling all my friends to find out how you cook steak without a grill. Angel comes through and tells me how to cook it in a pan. So I season the meat up and start cooking it. I put on rice and green beans as well. I'm feeling quite proud of myself for attempting to do this without someone helping me. So then my darling CB gets home. I haven't seen him since Monday morning, I'm buzzing from 4 Apple Martinis that I downed at Morton's during happy hour, so I am really happy to see him. He comes into the kitchen and gives me a hug and a kiss and says, "What are you cooking those steaks in?"
"A little bit of oil."
"Well, that's not how I wanted them. I was going to cook them."
"You didn't say that. You asked me what I was making YOU for dinner."
"Well, I can fix it."
So he proceeds to dump out the oil and start putting in this Marsala (sp?) wine and mushrooms into the pan. YUCK!!!! He knows I don't eat mushrooms and I'm probably not going to like it. Then he complains that I'm using the wrong utensils for those pans.
That's it. I throw up my hands and tell him that he can finish making dinner by himself and I leave the room. It's all I can do not to cry. I feel awful. At that moment in time it feels like our relationship will never work out. We can't even agree on what to eat for dinner. He's Steak Marsalla and I'm Hamburger Helper. I feel like I don't please him and make him happy. He comes into the office and tries to make amends. I just act casually and try not to be as upset on the outside as I feel on the inside. He asks me to come eat with him, but I have completely lost my appetite. I come out and and put one spoonful of rice and about 5 bites of steak on my plate. I sit down and try the steak. I hate it. It smells horrible and it tastes disgusting. I feed it to the dog.
Our relationship just feels "off" lately. Maybe it's because we aren't in that honeymoon stage anymore. Which if that's the case that sucks cause it really wasn't long enough. Maybe it's because we've both been stressed out lately. Could be that I'm just being way overly sensitive cause I am being visited by Aunt Flo. I have no idea. All I know is that I don't like it. So I decide not to sulk over the whole dinner issue. I do tell him that I am NEVER making dinner for him again. He laughs. I'm serious though. I'm actually a really good cook. He just never gets to see that because he wants to do it his way or he won't eat what I can make.
So we snuggle up and go to bed. I wake up this morning feeling really playful. I've missed him dreadfully these last few days. So we tickle and wrestle around. He pinches me for biting him. Now my arms are covered in tiny little pinch bruises. It was a good morning. It felt right. All is well in our world again. So now that his 7 day hiatus from "us" time is over, maybe I'll get lucky tonight. Or should I say he'll be the lucky one.... as this could be a perfect time to bust out that super sexy outfit. ;)

I am such a girl sometimes.

I watched The Notebook last night. I cried during the movie 3 times and when it ended I cried for about half an hour. That has to be one of the best love stories I have ever seen. I couldn't even tell the Cabana Boy what it was about without getting all teary about it. I want that kind of love. I want that kind of passion. I want that kind of commitment.

So while I love those kinds of movies where the guy gets the girl, I also hate them as well. I hate them because they set up this unrealistic expectation for the way life is supposed to be, the way love is supposed to be. Then when my relationships don't meet that perfect expectation I feel as if I failed somewhere. I suppose though, that is why we watch movies like that, to escape from real life. Who would want to see a movie about a normal everyday couple that falls into a permanant rut until they fall out of love, get divorced, and end up bitter and alone?

Damn this PMS. :p

I hate Mondays

My weekends go by entirely too fast anymore. Monday morning rolls around and the last thing I want to do is get out of bed. Cabana Boy is no help cause he gets to stay in bed and sleep another couple of hours. That just makes me want to stay in bed even more and play. We get so little morning playtime together with our work schedules. And that is such a shame cause when we do get that occasional morning moment together it is just the perfect way to start one's day.

My weekend was fairly uneventful as usual. I spent Friday night writing a paper for my American History class on the Salem Witch Trials. One of the points that I made in my essay was that if the media would have been around then the witche accusations would not have been limited to just Salem. It would have been a widespread worldwide witch epidemic. the theme of the paper was to discuss if similar mass hysteria and paranoia has been prevelent in recent history. I believe that it has. Just look at the Japanese Interment Camps, McCarthyism, and our current hatred of Muslims, and that is just what has gone on in this country. With today's media it takes very little to create panic in the average citizen. I know of an incident during the whole anthrax scare that proved just that. At the time I was working in the apartement industry and I was told this story by another property's employee. It seems that the maintanance guys thought it would be a riot if they slipped some Tide laundry detergent in through the mail slot of the leasing office. Well, the ladies of the office arrive the next morning and see this mysterious white powder all over. Panic ensues and they call the police thinking that some resident has committed domestic terrorism against them for posting a loud music or dog poop letter on their door. Needless to say within a few minutes this property was swarming with police, firemen, Hazmat, and paramedics, all there to address this potential disaster. Once word got to the prankster just how far his small joke had gone he sheepishly admitted his wrongdoing. I believe he was arrested and charged with a few misdemeanors. How sad though. Due to panic created by the media these women never stopped to think how completely irrational an idea that this B level property would be a target for terrorism. Had that been me I would've been pissed off that some unfunny asshole was making me have to vaccuum the damn carpet.

Saturday was fun as I attended my cousin's daughter's first birthday party, although technically she is 13 months now, but everyone has been too sick to party. I call my cousin's kids my neice and nephew as they are the closest I get to having the real thing. I absolutely adore these children. They truly light up my life and brighten my day whenever I see them. My nephew was outside playing in the dirt with his dad when I got there. He immediately runs up to me and says, "Auntie Bex, we're eating poo cake today!" We're eating what? LOL He grabs my hand and leads me inside to the birthday cake on the counter and tells me again, "We get to eat poo cake." And while the cake was chocolate, LOL, he was referring to the Winnie the Pooh that was drawn on the cake with icing. He is only two and a half, but smart as a whip. We promptly head back outside to dig in the dirt. He has this little kid's gardening set complete with wheelbarrow. He picks up one fo the tools and ask his dad, "What's this?" "Well, son that is just like daddy's last girlfriend, a dirty ho." To which my innocent little nephew promptly starts running around chanting, "Dirty ho. Dirty ho."

Saturday night I returned home to do some cleaning as the Cabana Boy had a friend coming in from out of town on Sunday and they would both be staying with me Sunday night. I thought it would be fun to plan a little sexy surprise for my favorite man. I had planned to do this for him on Valentine's day, but we ended up eating too late to have any fun with it. Saturday night would be perfect as both of us would be hungry enough for it. I had picked up some strawberries, raspberries, grapes, bananas, and apples as well as the requisite chocolate, whipped cream, and caramel to dip them into. I had a special little outfit for the occasion as well. That kind of outfit that is really hot and sexy in a sort of sweet and innocent way. He had mentioned being home no earlier then 11, so I got into the bath about 9 and started to get ready. I figured once he called to let me know he was on his way home I would have plenty of time to get the food ready. About 10 I'm in my room getting ready to put some yummy smelling lotion on and I hear the door. He's home early and he didn't call!!! Now normally, I would be thrilled to see him, but I'm PMS-y and I wanted to do something special for him so I'm a little pissy. He comes through the door also a little pissy. Not a good thing. So after getting everything settled in he starts asking me what I'm planning on fixing him for dinner. I reply that I had no warning and therefore had not time to prepare anything. And now I am really pissy about the whole thing. Him watching me cut up the fruit takes the romance out of it. My kitchen is connected to the living room, so it is impossible to prepare a surprise. He finally settles on having hot dogs. Fine. I start heating up the water and cleaning the kitchen a little. He comes in and immediately starts in with, "Why aren't the hot dogs in the water?" "Because the water isn't boiling yet." "Uuggghhh, your one of those people. Whoever told you to make hotdogs that way is wrong, baby." And then he proceeds to put the hotdogs in the water. Now I am really pissy. I hate that. Don't ask me to do something for you and then nitpick how I do it. The ex did that to me constantly. It makes me feel inadequate, like I'm not capable of properly taking care of my man. So I tell him that he's know responsible for making his own damn hotdogs and stomp off to my room to sulk. Not only did I not get to do something really special for him, but I can't even make him a simple dinner.
He comes in and tries to make up with me and I refuse. I'm not done pouting and he has no idea why I am so pissy. He begs me to finish making his dinner. I refuse. He eats his dinner and comes in again to make up. I still refuse. He comes in again and wants to watch me put lotion on. I really refuse now. It makes me very self conscious to be looked at. Unless the looker is saying things like, "Damn baby, you are so sexy (hot, pretty, beautiful, etc). Otherwise, I automatically assume that I am being judged harshly and he's inspecting my numerous flaws. Yet another insecurity brought to you by the Ex and the Ex-white collar fiancee. He begs for a kiss. I offer my lips but refuse to kiss back. I know by now that I have blown this whole thing way out of proportion. I hate it when I do this, but I am so stubborn when it comes to feeling disrespected whether is was unintentional or not. I know in my heart that my Cabana Boy would never intentionally disrespect me in any manner. I still couldn't get past it (damn PMS, my ass is going back on Depo Provera ASAP). Eventually he goes to bed without me, we have never done that before, I don't like it. I finish cleaning the house and go get ready for bed. Where I discover I have lost a contact. Now I need to see if I lost it in my eye. After vigorous searching for about 5 minutes I go to bed and tell the Cabana Boy what happened. He tries to look, but doesn't see anything. Feeling a little more relieved we go to bed. I snuggle up to him and kiss him, my way of apologizing for being a brat.

Sunday morning we get up kinda early for us and head out to the airport. We pick up his friend and go eat brunch at a local landmark, Pete's Kitchen. If you haven't eaten at Pete's at 3am you are missing out. We decide to go see the new Keanu flick, Constantine. I thought the movie was pretty decent, a little creepy, scary, gorey, but I liked the basic premise. After the movie we head home for awhile and hang out. I go into the bedroom to put something away and the Cabana Boy follows me in and proceeds to spank my ass. Hard. Ahhhh yes, the payback for last night's pouting. I deserved it, and I liked it but that is beside the point. For a tattooist his friend is actually quite normal looking and he is very nice. I had been a little nervous at first having some strange guy in my house, but once again I was pleasently surprised. I've got to quit being so paranoid. After dinner I had to hit the books and the guys watched the Grudge. From the 10 minutes I saw of it, I'm glad I missed it. We all headed off to bed after the movie was over. CB and I played around (no sex, ya pervs) and just made each other laugh. I love that part of our relationship, how easy and fun it is. He makes me so happy I actually go to sleep with a smile on my face and when I wake up it's still there. How awesome is that?

So stay tuned, dear readers, for that saucy little outfit is still unseen by my CB. I just need a new idea for another surprise. Any thoughts?

My Valentine

Have I told ya'll lately how very much I adore the Cabana Boy? Well, I do. I really, really do. He makes everyday feel like Valentine's Day. I miss him when he's gone. I think about him constantly. I want nothing more then to please him and make him as happy as he makes me.
Just thinking about his touch and the way he feels keeps me constantly aroused. I always want him. Morning, noon, night, and 10 times on Sundays. LOL ;) I love the way he looks at me, the tender way he holds me during scary movies, and the way he kisses me. I love that he calls just to say hi. I love that he is so silly he makes me laugh all the time. I love that he can take me from cranky or sad to happy and content with a single word or touch. And I love that he bites. Really hard. And what starts out as pain, quickly turns into pleasure. And I love how he knows just when to let go. I love the marks he leaves that ache, because with every ache I am reminded of the pleasure we share. I love the way he takes care of me. *sigh* See how sappy he makes me? LOL

Friends and Former Lovers....

Last Friday night I saw the Ex. It started out well and ended quite ugly. It all ended up being a farce just to get me there. He called and told me that he had some money to give me. I'm thinking, "Great!!! I can really use it." I get there to be handed fourteen dollars. Fourteen dollars. Are you fucking kidding me? And then I discovered the real motive behind the meeting. To cause me pain. The whole situation was just a reminder of how much I have changed since we were together. I met him when I was 14 and desperate to be loved. He showed me kindness and passion and I fell for him. Our relationship was always quite tumultuous and heart breaking. After four years of fighting and making up I finally got up enough courage to say enough. Enough hurting me. Enough disappointing me. Enough. Even though we were no longer speaking he was never far from my mind or my heart. With every relationship I compared the love I felt for them to the love I felt for him. It always seemed lacking. In my heart of hearts I was scared that I would never love another as much as I loved him. Finally, after not speaking for 7 years I had to find him. I felt that I would never be able to move on unless I gave myself that chance to see if the spark was still there. We wrote letters. We spoke. His words once again found that place in my heart that had been in the darkness for too long. He made me smile. He made me cry. I was sure that the Universe was giving us a second chance, and then he came here. And it wasn't the same. We had forgotten how to speak to one another. Our chemistry was off. The sex kinda sucked. Nothing was the same. It broke my heart. I was disappointed at first, but then I began to see what the true purpose of meeting again was. For me to let him go completely. For me to know that there is no going back to those special moments we shared. That while I loved him then, there is no way I could love him now. That my heart could finally be released from his chains and be free to give to someone else. And I found peace, dear readers. For the first time in a long time I found peace. No more nightmares. No more heartache. No more sadness tinting my world.
So this is how I felt when I saw him. Even though he had that hungry look in his eye, I was no longer drawn to it. Even though I had found my peace, he still knows how to hurt me to the core. He is the only person in this entire world that knows how to hurt me that deeply. To punish me for being happy and moving on with my life. He wants to date my best friend, Angel. It was so very devestating to hear those words. Not because he was moving on, but because I knew that such a thing would inevitably cause me to lose the best friend I have ever known. And that tore my heart out, dear readers.
Angel is the most beautiful person I know, inside and out. She is kind, generous, loving, funny, smart, independent, and just plain wonderful. I thank the Universe daily for allowing our paths to cross. Bottom line is that he is nowhere close to being good enough for her. She deserves a true man that will love, respect, and cherish her. The Ex is not that man. Needless to say we fought about this for an hour. During which time he put his hands on me in anger, he grabbed my face and forced me to look at him. If I struggled he held tighter, grabbing at my hair. All to make sure that I could look into his eyes and see the truth. That he is punishing me for moving on. That he is playing a game and doesn't care who gets hurt. That he hasn't really changed deep down at the core of his being. It really makes me quite sad for the boy that I knew. He had such potential then. I would have followed that boy to the ends of the earth. I would have done anything to make him happy. But that boy could not be saved. He would not be loved. And he would turn into this bitter man I know today. I truly hope that the man will someday know the peace I have come to find. I no longer wish him ill will. I no longer trust him. I no longer love him. I just feel pity for him. And that, dear readers, is the saddest part of it all.

Confronting the Scumbag Cousin

Well, dear readers, I finally made up my mind about what to do with that scandelous ass cousin of mine. Recent events have led me to a tentative reconciliation with his mother. We have not really spoken in 3 years. Also, through emails with him I found out that he hasn't actually met anyone yet, so I decided to give him a break and try and prevent it from happening. Here is our email in it's entirety.......


Deal.... When did you figure it out though? I have never met anyone from any site like this though. Just curious I guess. Call me... Do you still have the number?

*Sigh* I truly believe that everything happens for a reason. I have really been struggling with the reason that I came across you here, and what to do about it. Such a touchy subject the whole catching someone you know cheating on thier wife, but since it seems as if you haven't met anyone yet consider this devine intervention (insert his full name here). Think long and hard about what you're doing to your wife. Is it really worth losing your marriage over some stupid afternoon fling? Maybe I'm wrong about this whole thing and she knows about your extracurricular activities, and if that's the case more power to you. However, she doesn't seem to be that kind of person and discresion wouldn't be such a big deal if she was playing too. Therefore, I suggest you delete your profile and meet your wife for a nooner. This stays between us for now. Just so you know I will be deleting my profile from here as well, as I have gotten serious with someone myself. I hope that this little incident doesn't effect our relationship. Your cousin.

We could do that. Lunch sounds like a good thing to get started. Let me know when would work best for you.

I was thinking we could maybe meet for lunch or something. Just to verify that there really are real people on this thing. LOL Since neither one of us has actually met anyone yet.

I will be off on weds and Friday this week. What are you thinking?

Your life sounds busy like mine can be. We're both too busy to actually meet anyone from here. LOL So when are your days off this week?

Been extremely busy lately. Betwen having to work 48 and 72 hour shifts at work, truck shopping, keeping up with a class I am taking, and all the normal stuff, uhg! So what are you up to? I have to go and pick up some accessories for the new truck and go to class at noon today. Would love to get to gether with you sometime.

I've been really great, thanks for asking. And you?

NOpe... not yet anyway. Been waiting to hear back from you. How have you been?

You must've found your playmate....

Well... anything specific you would like to know, just ask. What are you hoping to find with the two of us? Anychance of seeing any more photos of you?

Anything else you want to tell me.....

Actually... I do come here often. Just haven't found the right one yet. Looking for someone that wants to get to know eachother and hook up for some hot daytime activities. What else would you like to know?

So tell me a little more about you.... Come here often? LOL I keep hoping to have heard from you each time I log onto the site. Am I ever going to hear back from you? Would love to get to know you and your dreams...

In the spirit of education.....

I am going to start asking my friends and dear readers the tough questions about sex. I think we could all use a little better understanding of the opposite sex. I was so inspired by the fabulous conversation I had with the Sexy Stud Muffin today that I came up with a little questionnaire. If you are game to be honest about your sex life send me an email at: justduckeedates@gmail.com and I will be happy to chat with you!!!

What non-sexual act really turns you on?

What is off limits in the bedroom?

How do you feel about oral?

How do you feel about anal?

What does giving good head consist of?

What do guys/girls want in the bedroom?

What is your favorite position?

What is the worst thing a guy/girl could do in bed?

What is your most embarassing sex moment?

What turns you off?

What do you wish your guy/girl would do more of?

What haven't you tried that you really want to?
Are you afraid to ask for it?

What is your fetish?

What is your best sexual moment?

Give one piece of must know advice to the opposite sex:

A little help from a friend.....

Somehow my friend Sexy Stud Muffin and I came upon the topic of sex. One of the many benefits to having friends of the opposite sex is being able to have an honest conversation about sex without feeling insecure or jealous. *Conversation has been edited to remove personal content not relevent to this blog.

Me: cause I am a good girl and good girls don’t take it in the ass
Sexy Stud Muffin: God, girls are so reserved....
Sexy Stud Muffin: I'm seeing a girl right now down here that has been with the same guy for the last 7 years up until about a month ago
Sexy Stud Muffin: she is the same way.
Me: yeah my rule is if you want to do something to me I get to do it to you first
Me: cause it's not fair to expect me to do something that you yourself wouldn't do
Sexy Stud Muffin: I hear ya... totally crazy way to think about it, but I see what you mean
Sexy Stud Muffin: LOL
Sexy Stud Muffin: This girl and I just got it on for the first time the night before last....
Sexy Stud Muffin: Her and I haven't explored anything together yet.
Sexy Stud Muffin: But you can damn well bet we will.
Sexy Stud Muffin: Shit, our sex was great though!!!
Me: LOL
Sexy Stud Muffin: so needless to say.... she came 6 times in 45 minutes.
Me: DAMN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sexy Stud Muffin: Yea... I’m a stud...
Sexy Stud Muffin: LOL
Sexy Stud Muffin: Yea... and yes I know for a fact that she came... she wasn't faking it.
Sexy Stud Muffin: I know what I'm doin when It comes to pleasing a woman.
Sexy Stud Muffin: Don't mean to brag about it though.
Me: so what is your method?
Sexy Stud Muffin: No method per say... I just know how to fuck....
Sexy Stud Muffin: as long as I am sober mind you... and even if I’m not, I'm still good do go.
Me: knowing how to fuck is good, but there are very few women that can have an orgasm just from penetration
Sexy Stud Muffin: Oh, I totally know that.
Sexy Stud Muffin: when I was younger, an older woman had a sex talk with me... she told me how to please a woman.
Me: well that had to be useful
Sexy Stud Muffin: She told me it was important to know how to please a woman..... and to not think that what I see in a porn movie is how it is done.
Sexy Stud Muffin: So, I learned from a lesbian... I'm still learning though. This one girl I was seeing for a minute is Bi, so she showed me a few things too
Me: well that's cool you got pointers
Me: cause most girls are way too self-conscious to ask for what they want
Me: or try something new
Sexy Stud Muffin: Yea, I know... luckily I've been with a few that had no problem telling me what they wanted.
Sexy Stud Muffin: It also helps that I have the magical ability to control when I come
Sexy Stud Muffin: or if I do, I can keep going... and going... and going....
Me: DAMN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Me: =P~
Me: lol
Sexy Stud Muffin: hehe..... I've gone for hours... many times.... like all day long fucking sessions.
Me: well I dunno about that long
Me: lol
Me: the kitty does get tired after awhile
Sexy Stud Muffin: If the girl wants it, I can give it to her.
Sexy Stud Muffin: But I know what you mean.
Me: yeah I am just now finding the courage to speak up
Me: so I still have a lot of reservations about a lot of stuff
Sexy Stud Muffin: Definitely do it... you won't regret it. But the same goes both ways too... when you start telling him how to do things, at some point, he will tell you what he wants.
Sexy Stud Muffin: When It comes to sex, I have few reservations about it. Only a few things I won't do...
Me: such as.....
Sexy Stud Muffin: Well, nothing super nasty... and I am not at all into receiving any kind of anal play.... Just the extreme nasty shit....
Me: now see.... that's kinda fucked up
Sexy Stud Muffin: Why is that fucked up? Have you ever received anal before?
Me: cause you want to be playing with your girl's ass and she can't play back
Me: that's not fair
Me: and no my bootie is still untouched LOL
Sexy Stud Muffin: Well, at the point you get it in the ass... you will love it. I've never met a girl that took it in the ass and didn’t love it. They just need to get over it being "taboo"
Sexy Stud Muffin: I guarantee it.
Me: yeah boyfriend really wants to pop that cherry
Me: he may be waiting awhile though
Me: lol
Sexy Stud Muffin: Every girl I've ever met totally loves it.
Sexy Stud Muffin: I think it feels different for a girl than it does for a guy.
Sexy Stud Muffin: not sure though....
Sexy Stud Muffin: even though a guys G spot is in his ass.
Me: the male gspot is in your ass ya know
Sexy Stud Muffin: go figure
Sexy Stud Muffin: I know
Me: lol
Me: jinx
Sexy Stud Muffin: LOL
Sexy Stud Muffin: But there are other ways to hit a guys g spot without having to touch his ass.
Me: true
Me: but some guys freak about that too
Me: no touching the taint
Me: lol
Sexy Stud Muffin: Yea... but it's a little less invasive. Try it on him next time you are giving him head.
Sexy Stud Muffin: start giving him really good head, and I bet he wouldn't even notice
Me: so what constitutes really good head?
Sexy Stud Muffin: The biggest thing is to use your hand....
Sexy Stud Muffin: the combination of the hand and your mouth.... oh yea....
Sexy Stud Muffin: lots of spit
Me: how much attention do the boys need?
Sexy Stud Muffin: um... if you are trying to get him off that way... kinda depends.
Sexy Stud Muffin: some guys can't even get off that way.
Sexy Stud Muffin: using your hand at the same time will definitely help.... how bad is your gag reflex?
Me: I have some good head stuff that curbs the gag reflex
Sexy Stud Muffin: There you go.... that or if he isn't that big for it to be a concern... but use your hand, and periodically, push your head all the way down as far as you can....
Sexy Stud Muffin: another good thing.
Sexy Stud Muffin: It's funny that we are having this conversation... as you can tell, I'm not modest when it comes to this shit.
Me: excellent
Sexy Stud Muffin: Any other questions or advice you want since we're on the topic?
Me: tell me how to please my man oh wise one
Me: seriously
Sexy Stud Muffin: LOL
Me: what do guys want in the sack?
Sexy Stud Muffin: That also depends on the guy... now this isn't speaking for all guys, but a lot of them like it rough.
Sexy Stud Muffin: More of a fucking than "lets make love"
Sexy Stud Muffin: For me, sex that is geared more towards fucking is a lot more fun.
Sexy Stud Muffin: but it's not always the case... depends on the mood too.
Me: favorite postion?
Sexy Stud Muffin: having a girl ride is fun... after a guy has been pumping and doing all the work, switch it up, and you do some of the work.
Sexy Stud Muffin: Gotta let the guy rest.
Sexy Stud Muffin: Doggie is another favorite...
Sexy Stud Muffin: lots of wet slobbery kissing is a plus....
Sexy Stud Muffin: let him pull your hair while doin doggie... some ass slapping.
Me: what's the worst thing a girl can do in bed?
Sexy Stud Muffin: the worse thing??
Sexy Stud Muffin: never laugh!
Sexy Stud Muffin: no matter how innocent
Sexy Stud Muffin: unless it is because of something funny that both of you guys are laughing about.
Me: how would you handle a potential embarrassing situation for a girl?
Sexy Stud Muffin: How do I word this....
Me: seeing as how most girls are afraid of doing something that would potentially make you never want to have sex with them again
Sexy Stud Muffin: For me, many embarrassing things have happened for a girl, but lets admit it, the whole sex thing in general is somewhat nasty as it is....
Me: true when you break it down
Sexy Stud Muffin: so doin a girl doggie, they get a lot of air in them, so when they move, all that air comes out.
Sexy Stud Muffin: I have experienced that many times... I've never really paid much attention to it.
Sexy Stud Muffin: not something you can really help.
Me: ignoring it is good
Sexy Stud Muffin: and hopefully the guy knows that. Most guys that have had any kind of sex life knows the same, and knows to not laugh or make any kind of big deal about it.
Me: what could happen that would really gross you out or turn you off?
Sexy Stud Muffin: hehe...
Sexy Stud Muffin: again, that would depend on the guy... for me personally? I've had girls come all over my face, and they lick it off me... some guys would be grossed out about that...
Sexy Stud Muffin: you know.. the girls that can actually squirt?
Me: I've heard all about the gushing
Sexy Stud Muffin: From what I hear around... not to much would gross a guy out.
Me: although I've yet to have a guy that can make that happen
Sexy Stud Muffin: Well, only some girls can actually do it. But I'm talking about spraying out gushing.
Sexy Stud Muffin: not just super wet
Sexy Stud Muffin: Scared the shit out of me the first time it happened to me... but my god was it hot!!!
Me: LOL
Sexy Stud Muffin: As far as "gross" things happening, hopefully the guy you are with isn't an immature person.. if he is, then he's going to act like a jackass about it....
Sexy Stud Muffin: if something happens, and it is a concern... try to just play it off, like you meant to do it. Or you just ignore it, and keep going.
Me: good advice
Me: anything girls don't do that they should do more of?
Sexy Stud Muffin: Tell the guy what they want.
Sexy Stud Muffin: I'm telling you.. if you tell him to do what you want right in the heat of passion, it's on. It makes it easier to tell the guy right when you're in the middle of it... instead of sitting down talking about it
Sexy Stud Muffin: when he is doing you doggy, tell him to pull your hair... smack your ass etc...
Sexy Stud Muffin: if anything, it'll excite him more.
Sexy Stud Muffin: Teasing is fun too... another one to try.
Sexy Stud Muffin: tease the guy till he feels like his nuts are about to fall off....
Sexy Stud Muffin: then tear him up.... but with that, expect him to not last a super long time.
Me: so in your opinion how can a guy make a girl feel more comfortable to be able to let loose?
Sexy Stud Muffin: My way to do that is to do lots of sweet, soft, yet arousing touching and kissing...
Sexy Stud Muffin: I'd act like I was going to kiss the girl... kind of back up and smile... lick their lips...
Sexy Stud Muffin: grab the back of their head and kiss them lots...
Sexy Stud Muffin: good to kiss and lick their neck and ears...
Sexy Stud Muffin: yea, by then it's on.
Sexy Stud Muffin: Gentle touching is the key.
Me: I agree with all that
Sexy Stud Muffin: And depending on how long you have been with the person, or if it is a fuck buddy, or a one night thing... whisper stuff into her ear...
Sexy Stud Muffin: oh, and during the licking of the neck and hear, breath... especially into thier ear...
Sexy Stud Muffin: Shit... a lot of this shit is shit that turns me on!!
Sexy Stud Muffin: LOL
Me: lol
Sexy Stud Muffin: But it seems to work for the women too
Me: funny how a lot of that stuff works both ways
Me: unlike your ass
Sexy Stud Muffin: True dat...
Sexy Stud Muffin: AND TRUE DAT!
Sexy Stud Muffin: LOL
Sexy Stud Muffin: Yea, steer clear of that one.
Sexy Stud Muffin: But like I said... try the other thing while you're giving him head.
Sexy Stud Muffin: I've had that done to me, and I barely noticed what was going on...
Sexy Stud Muffin: but it sure felt good!!
Me: so how do you make a girl want to pop her bootie cherry?
Sexy Stud Muffin: The guy has to has to HAS TO be gentle about it.
Sexy Stud Muffin: Simple... a guys asks.... she says no, or maybe another time... guy has to respect that.
Sexy Stud Muffin: A lot of times, it is never even asked.... when a guy is doing a girl doggy... a lot of times some touching takes place... then before you know it.. there is a finger in the booty...
Sexy Stud Muffin: that's the first step... to play with it... get the girl used to having that area even touched.
Sexy Stud Muffin: so just start off with playing with it...
Sexy Stud Muffin: open communication about this one is pretty damn necessary... especially if the girl has never received before....
Sexy Stud Muffin: using fingers to loosen is a must too
Sexy Stud Muffin: that muscle expands and contract....
Sexy Stud Muffin: therefore, loosening is required as well as the girl relaxing.
Sexy Stud Muffin: good rule of thumb for the guy... when it happens, hold yourself in there without moving for a minute.... no pumping or anything.... just sit there... once it's a little looser, then go for it.. but be gentle.
Me: so what was your best sexual experience?
Sexy Stud Muffin: Oh man... you sure you wanna hear this one?
Me: yup
Sexy Stud Muffin: My best sexual experience was this girl I dated for a little over a month...
Sexy Stud Muffin: She was one of the few girls that liked it nice and rough.... really rough.
Sexy Stud Muffin: not s&m bondage shit, but she liked to be tossed around
Sexy Stud Muffin: now, not all girls are like her, but he like to have her brains fucked out hard.....
Sexy Stud Muffin: this is the same girl that I've gone hours with
Sexy Stud Muffin: she broke out the monster in me... this girl like to have her hair pulled ass smacked, choked...
Sexy Stud Muffin: you name it, she like it.
Sexy Stud Muffin: one time she actually asked me to smack her while we were going at it.
Sexy Stud Muffin: so I did... she fucking loved it.
Sexy Stud Muffin: right across her face.. open hand of course.
Me: damn
Sexy Stud Muffin: Yea.... it's pretty crazy.. I've never been with a girl like that before.
Sexy Stud Muffin: so anyway
Sexy Stud Muffin: one time, her and I were talking about the sex we have and how fun it was... she told me that it was just getting started...
Sexy Stud Muffin: I asked her what she had in mind... she told me that she was scared about the size of fist I had....
Sexy Stud Muffin: ????"
Sexy Stud Muffin: I'm thinking... hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Sexy Stud Muffin: She wanted me to fist her.
Sexy Stud Muffin: NEVER done that before.....
Sexy Stud Muffin: So we were goin at it... I was going down on her....
Sexy Stud Muffin: I drenched my hand in spit, and eased it in...before you know it, my hand all the way up to my wrist was in here.
Sexy Stud Muffin: that was probably my craziest sexual experience.
Sexy Stud Muffin: that night we fucked for about 4 hours... I came probably 4-5 times...
Sexy Stud Muffin: she did the same
Sexy Stud Muffin: Again, very few girls are like that.
Me: I would say a lot of girls might like that but never ask for it
Me: pain that is
Me: not fisting
Me: lol
Sexy Stud Muffin: I think you are probably right.
Sexy Stud Muffin: Well, after that girl... I started exploring it with other girls... not to that extreme, but the choking and hard hair pulling and stuff
Me: hair pulling is fabulous
Sexy Stud Muffin: it is isn't it? Even for the puller....
Me: there's just something about that show of dominanace
Me: mmmm mmmmmm
Sexy Stud Muffin: the dominance thing goes both ways though
Sexy Stud Muffin: I've had girls "dominate" me...
Sexy Stud Muffin: and that's a lot of fun too.
Me: what haven’t you done that you want to?
Sexy Stud Muffin: LOL.... what HAVEN'T I've done?
Sexy Stud Muffin: You'll have to actually give me some ideas.... I can't think of anything really crazy that I haven't already done.
Me: sex in public?
Me: sex for an audience?
Me: sex on film?
Sexy Stud Muffin: I've done all of those....
Me: orgy?
Sexy Stud Muffin: small orgy... 5 people....
Sexy Stud Muffin: I'm telling you.. sex for me is like... getting tattooed or something... it isn't something I'm reserved with.
Sexy Stud Muffin: it's more like an extra curricular activity...
Me: LOL
Sexy Stud Muffin: Sex in public is fun... The thrill of getting caught... or getting caught can be just as fun!! :)
Sexy Stud Muffin: I love to take pictures of girls that I'm having sex with... or making videos' (with their permission of course)
Sexy Stud Muffin: Not sure what the deal is, but it is a blast!
Me: do you have any fetishes?
Sexy Stud Muffin: Shit... if anything, the whole ass thing... I like to fuck a girl in the ass... it almost falls under the whole dominance thing... since not many girls do it, to be able to is almost like a control thing... plus not to mention it feels WONDERFUL
Sexy Stud Muffin: That and the dominance thing... being rough...
Sexy Stud Muffin: Alright.... I gotta get goin sweetie....
Me: thanks for being my guinea pig darlin
Me: I'll blog tonight and you can read all about you tomorrow
Me: lol
Sexy Stud Muffin: Sweet.. you're welcome.
Me: see ya laterz
Sexy Stud Muffin: Later sweet tits.

Everyone should have their very own Cabana Boy

Especially if he is as good as mine. ;) Our time together started late Saturday night when he came over after he got off work. I had finally rid my house of all annoying house guests and we got the time alone together we had so desperately been craving for weeks. Even though we had a little playtime together a few nights before I was still very nervous to actually be close to him. We decided to start things off by taking a candlelit bubble bath together. I am actually a big fan of bathtime play, the way the soapy water allows hands to caress skin so smoothly. As the water began to get hotter we made the move to the bedroom. In the beginning of our conversations the goal of our relationship was to have a little fun in his piercing room, yet somehow in all of our conversations the relationship evolved and it became less and less about being naughty and more and more about being something truly special. And that is exactly how he made me feel allllll night long, truly special. I had no doubt that I wanted to have sex with this man, I just didn't realize that I would end up making love to this man. Once we were both spent and exhausted, we drifted off to sleep. A few hours later I was awakened by his urgent need. I love to woken up for sex. It turns me on to no end knowing that a man wants me that badly. After another greatly satisfying round, we once again drifted off to la-la land in each other's arms.
Finally waking up late Sunday morning, we decided to shower and go meet my friend for a late lunch. And once again we were heating up the water and needed to find another location in which to play. The bathroom counter really comes in handy for those types of occasions. ;) I think the sillouette my body left on the mirror is so sexy. It is just a reminder of how passionate two people can become for one another. We met my friend and her son for lunch after we did a little bit of shopping. And can you believe dear ones, that I was actually to tired to shop for shoes? Do you see what he is doing to me??!!?? LOL After we ate we went and picked up some movies and some snacks and headed back to my place for some quality cuddle time. And don'tcha know that the couch had to see some action too. Monday morning we said our goodbyes and headed off to our respective careers. Me off to my life in a cube working a job I hate because it pays the bills and him off to the shop working a job he loves. Just another way we are so different.
If I had met the Cabana Boy in life I don't know that I would have chose him. He is the most extreme man I have ever dated. Don't get me wrong though, dear readers, I have a fetish for bad boys, especially bad boys with shaved heads and tattoos. However, the Cabana Boy lives his life by his own set of rules, he follows no trend. He has a shaved head alright, with a blue/green mohawk. He has tattoos alright, everywhere. He's got some piercings alright, and one quite frankly I was a little unsure of to begin with but have since decided that I kinda like it after all. That is his lifestyle though. I just don't know that I would have ever considered trying to encompass that kind of a lifestyle into my own. And what a shame that would have been if I had passed him by. For despite his outward appearance, he is one of the sweetest, kindest, most generous people I know. He treats me like a princess and makes me feel special with every word and touch. And he is not just kind to me, he is kind to my friends, and that makes him even greater in my eyes. He is even kind to Diva the Wonder Dog when she is being annoying.
I have been walking around in my life these last few years down on love. Love bites. Well, I got lucky and love finally bit back (I have the marks on my neck to prove it, hee hee). I am still trying to keep my heart guarded, as it has been broken so many times. But everytime I see him and he makes me smile another brick in the wall comes down. I'm not sure where this whole relationship is going to go, but I do know this, dear readers, I am damn sure gonna enjoy the ride.

Sleazy, Slimeball Cousin Update.....

Well, dear readers, I know this is a hot topic and I have really been torn about how to handle the situation. I don't want anyone hurt unneccessarily or to cause too much drama in my life over it. So while I was trying to figure out the right thing to do, my cousin just kept emailing me and emailing me on AFF. (Sidenote: I do not have pictures of my face on there. I do that so I can maintain my anonymity as well as my innocence. LOL) Here are the emails he's sent:

Subject: lets chat...
Good morning!Thanks for acceprting the invitation to join my network. Would love to get to know you better and see where this may take us.

Subject: ???????????
I keep hoping to have heard from you each time I log onto the site. Am I ever going to hear back from you? Would love to get to know you and your dreams...

It was this one I finally decided to reply to. If he is going to be this persistant, then he deserves to get busted. I am trying to get as much information out of him as I can, so when I confront him (and/or his wife) I have a lot of proof.
My response:
Date: Jan 27, 2005 12:24 pm PST
So tell me a little more about you....
Come here often? LOL

Actually... I do come here often. Just haven't found the right one yet. Looking for someone that wants to get to know eachother and hook up for some hot daytime activities. What else would you like to know?

Anything else you want to tell me.....

Well... anything specific you want to know? Tell me about yourself. What are you hoping to find with me? Any chance of seeing some more photos of you? Please in all that is good in this world, please, please, please do not let my pics be in his spank bank. EEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

Well... anything specific you would like to know, just ask. What are you hoping to find with the two of us? Any chance of seeing any more photos of you? And the name seals the deal, not that I had much doubt, but this really is my cousin. Excuse me while I go THROW UP MY LUNCH NOW!!!!!!

So at this point the plan is definately to bust him. It's the when and how I'm still considering. Like I said, everything in life happens for a reason. The people you meet, the ones that break your heart, bad experiences, and great accomplishments it's all there to be learned from and to help you grow. There is a reason that this situation occurred and a lesson one or both of us needs to learn from it.

Detroit has more then hot cars....

it's got hot boys as well. Especially my friend Lucky. He is a real cutie-patootie. If ever I was gonna date a younger man it would be him. He has a great head on his shoulders, he works 3 jobs to be able to afford his toys. He's got a house, classic car, chopper, and a boat. This boy has it all; looks, smarts, humor, and a razor sharp tongue. We have been friends for over a year now, and we have never even met or spoken on the phone. We just talk mad shit in private messages (and sometimes posts) on a message board. Isn't it funny how well you can get to know someone online? That is how I found my Cabana Boy after all, but I'll save that for another time. ;)
He really cracks me up with his crazy messages, so I just thought I would share some with you, dear readers......


Re: Fine...
From: Lucky
Hey shithead, I was the last one to reply to you wasn't I? Wait, maybe not. Anyways, why are you bustin' my balls? Sometimes you are here, sometimes not, sometimes is Spirit...I've been working INSANE hours! 7 days a week. Trying to get all these jobs done before I go to Mexico in 2 weeks. I'm desparately in need of a vacation. I'm back to paying people to work 1/2 days for me at the firehouse so I can work my other jobs. So are you still mad at me? Let's have anal sex and make up. What's going on in denver w/ the ex? I got a g-mail account now but forgot my address, I'll have to get you my address so you can send me dity pictures of you in naughty outfits. Did ya miss me?


Re: Fine...
From: Lucky
Blahblahblah@gmail.com I like girls in Lingerie!!!!! Yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyhhhhhhhh!


Re: Fine...
From: Lucky
I love you.


Re: Fine...
From: Lucky
So, where are they? The corset, fuck me pumps, thigh highs????? You can't leave me here with this erection. Wait, you probably will you evil little fucker.