So you think you're ready for the "one"?

Being a single girl I like to cruise a variety of matchmaking sites to see what is out there in the world beyond my front door. I've never had much luck in this area however. I have great emails, better phone calls, and after we finally meet in person I never hear from the loser again. I am the kind of girl that guys respond to after knowing for awhile. I picture it something like this: first glance "She's cute. Great personality." and then after hanging out as friends for awhile "Wow. I really like being around her. She's got such a great smile. I wonder what it would be like to kiss her." and then after the kiss and more I make them turn psycho (but that is a post for another day).

So in reading all these personal ads one thing really gets under my skin. I read this huge diatribe about how this guy wants a girl who will treat him right, not play games, must have a brain, not looking for a sugar daddy, etc. etc. And then comes his physical requirements: she must be a size 2, good teeth, perfect hair, no flaws, athletic, etc. etc.

And what do you think he looks like? Well, he is not Brad Pitt or Mark Wahlberg by any means. He's got a beer belly, yellow teeth and a shitty job.

So here's my issue: if you really want a woman that will has all the unsuperficial qualities does it really matter if her hair isn't the right color or if she is chubby? Not all women stay a size 2 forever. Some get pregnant, gain 50 lbs. and never lost the weight. Some women age horrifically and drain your bank account in attempts to regain their youth and really just end up being made of plastic.

I can be guilty of making judgements based solely on looks myself. I have also dated men that are not the "hottest" guy in the room by any means. I found what I liked in them though, whether it was the way they looked at me or how they always seemed to take my best interest to heart. I just think it is narrow-minded to have a physical ideal of what your perfect person looks like. It is better to know who you want and need them to be. For me I want an old-fashioned gentlemen that respects women, children, and animals and believes in holding a door open and escorting a little old lady across the street. I have a friend that at first glance I thought "never in a million years" he is nothing that I would normally be attracted to, and yet, as we got to know each other the more I became attracted to him. Now I think we would be great together if only that pesky girlfriend would go away. I've also had guys that I have drooled over at first glance and said to myself, "He would never go for me. I am not pretty/skinny/punk rock/whatever enough for him." And in a few short months of being friends we are making out and dating. It just goes to show that you never know who you will be attracted to or why. So to me we should be putting less emphasis on how a person looks and more emphasis on who they are. Looks can change. Personality can not.