I hate Mondays

My weekends go by entirely too fast anymore. Monday morning rolls around and the last thing I want to do is get out of bed. Cabana Boy is no help cause he gets to stay in bed and sleep another couple of hours. That just makes me want to stay in bed even more and play. We get so little morning playtime together with our work schedules. And that is such a shame cause when we do get that occasional morning moment together it is just the perfect way to start one's day.

My weekend was fairly uneventful as usual. I spent Friday night writing a paper for my American History class on the Salem Witch Trials. One of the points that I made in my essay was that if the media would have been around then the witche accusations would not have been limited to just Salem. It would have been a widespread worldwide witch epidemic. the theme of the paper was to discuss if similar mass hysteria and paranoia has been prevelent in recent history. I believe that it has. Just look at the Japanese Interment Camps, McCarthyism, and our current hatred of Muslims, and that is just what has gone on in this country. With today's media it takes very little to create panic in the average citizen. I know of an incident during the whole anthrax scare that proved just that. At the time I was working in the apartement industry and I was told this story by another property's employee. It seems that the maintanance guys thought it would be a riot if they slipped some Tide laundry detergent in through the mail slot of the leasing office. Well, the ladies of the office arrive the next morning and see this mysterious white powder all over. Panic ensues and they call the police thinking that some resident has committed domestic terrorism against them for posting a loud music or dog poop letter on their door. Needless to say within a few minutes this property was swarming with police, firemen, Hazmat, and paramedics, all there to address this potential disaster. Once word got to the prankster just how far his small joke had gone he sheepishly admitted his wrongdoing. I believe he was arrested and charged with a few misdemeanors. How sad though. Due to panic created by the media these women never stopped to think how completely irrational an idea that this B level property would be a target for terrorism. Had that been me I would've been pissed off that some unfunny asshole was making me have to vaccuum the damn carpet.

Saturday was fun as I attended my cousin's daughter's first birthday party, although technically she is 13 months now, but everyone has been too sick to party. I call my cousin's kids my neice and nephew as they are the closest I get to having the real thing. I absolutely adore these children. They truly light up my life and brighten my day whenever I see them. My nephew was outside playing in the dirt with his dad when I got there. He immediately runs up to me and says, "Auntie Bex, we're eating poo cake today!" We're eating what? LOL He grabs my hand and leads me inside to the birthday cake on the counter and tells me again, "We get to eat poo cake." And while the cake was chocolate, LOL, he was referring to the Winnie the Pooh that was drawn on the cake with icing. He is only two and a half, but smart as a whip. We promptly head back outside to dig in the dirt. He has this little kid's gardening set complete with wheelbarrow. He picks up one fo the tools and ask his dad, "What's this?" "Well, son that is just like daddy's last girlfriend, a dirty ho." To which my innocent little nephew promptly starts running around chanting, "Dirty ho. Dirty ho."

Saturday night I returned home to do some cleaning as the Cabana Boy had a friend coming in from out of town on Sunday and they would both be staying with me Sunday night. I thought it would be fun to plan a little sexy surprise for my favorite man. I had planned to do this for him on Valentine's day, but we ended up eating too late to have any fun with it. Saturday night would be perfect as both of us would be hungry enough for it. I had picked up some strawberries, raspberries, grapes, bananas, and apples as well as the requisite chocolate, whipped cream, and caramel to dip them into. I had a special little outfit for the occasion as well. That kind of outfit that is really hot and sexy in a sort of sweet and innocent way. He had mentioned being home no earlier then 11, so I got into the bath about 9 and started to get ready. I figured once he called to let me know he was on his way home I would have plenty of time to get the food ready. About 10 I'm in my room getting ready to put some yummy smelling lotion on and I hear the door. He's home early and he didn't call!!! Now normally, I would be thrilled to see him, but I'm PMS-y and I wanted to do something special for him so I'm a little pissy. He comes through the door also a little pissy. Not a good thing. So after getting everything settled in he starts asking me what I'm planning on fixing him for dinner. I reply that I had no warning and therefore had not time to prepare anything. And now I am really pissy about the whole thing. Him watching me cut up the fruit takes the romance out of it. My kitchen is connected to the living room, so it is impossible to prepare a surprise. He finally settles on having hot dogs. Fine. I start heating up the water and cleaning the kitchen a little. He comes in and immediately starts in with, "Why aren't the hot dogs in the water?" "Because the water isn't boiling yet." "Uuggghhh, your one of those people. Whoever told you to make hotdogs that way is wrong, baby." And then he proceeds to put the hotdogs in the water. Now I am really pissy. I hate that. Don't ask me to do something for you and then nitpick how I do it. The ex did that to me constantly. It makes me feel inadequate, like I'm not capable of properly taking care of my man. So I tell him that he's know responsible for making his own damn hotdogs and stomp off to my room to sulk. Not only did I not get to do something really special for him, but I can't even make him a simple dinner.
He comes in and tries to make up with me and I refuse. I'm not done pouting and he has no idea why I am so pissy. He begs me to finish making his dinner. I refuse. He eats his dinner and comes in again to make up. I still refuse. He comes in again and wants to watch me put lotion on. I really refuse now. It makes me very self conscious to be looked at. Unless the looker is saying things like, "Damn baby, you are so sexy (hot, pretty, beautiful, etc). Otherwise, I automatically assume that I am being judged harshly and he's inspecting my numerous flaws. Yet another insecurity brought to you by the Ex and the Ex-white collar fiancee. He begs for a kiss. I offer my lips but refuse to kiss back. I know by now that I have blown this whole thing way out of proportion. I hate it when I do this, but I am so stubborn when it comes to feeling disrespected whether is was unintentional or not. I know in my heart that my Cabana Boy would never intentionally disrespect me in any manner. I still couldn't get past it (damn PMS, my ass is going back on Depo Provera ASAP). Eventually he goes to bed without me, we have never done that before, I don't like it. I finish cleaning the house and go get ready for bed. Where I discover I have lost a contact. Now I need to see if I lost it in my eye. After vigorous searching for about 5 minutes I go to bed and tell the Cabana Boy what happened. He tries to look, but doesn't see anything. Feeling a little more relieved we go to bed. I snuggle up to him and kiss him, my way of apologizing for being a brat.

Sunday morning we get up kinda early for us and head out to the airport. We pick up his friend and go eat brunch at a local landmark, Pete's Kitchen. If you haven't eaten at Pete's at 3am you are missing out. We decide to go see the new Keanu flick, Constantine. I thought the movie was pretty decent, a little creepy, scary, gorey, but I liked the basic premise. After the movie we head home for awhile and hang out. I go into the bedroom to put something away and the Cabana Boy follows me in and proceeds to spank my ass. Hard. Ahhhh yes, the payback for last night's pouting. I deserved it, and I liked it but that is beside the point. For a tattooist his friend is actually quite normal looking and he is very nice. I had been a little nervous at first having some strange guy in my house, but once again I was pleasently surprised. I've got to quit being so paranoid. After dinner I had to hit the books and the guys watched the Grudge. From the 10 minutes I saw of it, I'm glad I missed it. We all headed off to bed after the movie was over. CB and I played around (no sex, ya pervs) and just made each other laugh. I love that part of our relationship, how easy and fun it is. He makes me so happy I actually go to sleep with a smile on my face and when I wake up it's still there. How awesome is that?

So stay tuned, dear readers, for that saucy little outfit is still unseen by my CB. I just need a new idea for another surprise. Any thoughts?